Hating Others Is Hating Yourself

I remember being younger and being confused when people would tell me that hating others is hating yourself. I distinctly remember a friend telling me “well if you don’t like what she’s been doing it’s because it reminds you of yourself.”

I remember being extremely against this philosophy, because many of the people I disliked at the time were very, very, VERY different than me. 

For example, I’ve always been someone who values being polite and following social customs (like saying “please” and “thank you”), and therefore rudeness used to really grind my gears.  So, I would think, how is it possible that my hating this rude behavior has anything to do with myself?

Today, however, I’ve come more into alignment with the idea that “hating others is hating yourself.” I’ve taken a much broader perspective of this idea than I once had. 

I don’t think we hate others because we ourselves necessarily mirror the same behavior we dislike.  I think instead, hating others is hating yourself because the others are you and you are the others.

Let me explain…

From my viewpoint, and the viewpoint of many in the field of consciousness these days, we are all interconnected to one grand source of consciousness.  It is my belief that each of our lives are simply different perspectives of this grand consciousness, but we are all, ultimately, one in the same.

For example, let’s say that the grand, infinite consciousness is in the shape of a human body.  Perhaps I am a hand, and you are the heart. Perhaps my neighbor is a foot, and a stranger down the street is an ear.  We are all different pieces of the whole, we are all interconnected and we all work in harmony together. However, we each have different jobs, different behaviors, different physical appearances and different ways of being.

When I decide I hate my neighbor, it’s similar to the idea that my hand doesn’t like my foot.  They are different parts, yes, but they are of the same being, so when one hates the other, it in turn hates itself.

For me to get angry at my neighbor is for me to deny his specific role in the wholeness that makes up the grand consciousness we are both a part of. 

Perhaps his behavior is different than mine and perhaps he makes radically opposite choices to mine. However, this is only because he is a different perspective of consciousness, and it his job to look at things differently than me.

So often we get mad at other people for not being like us. For not carrying our values, our beliefs, and our behaviors.  However, if we start to understand that other people serve a valuable role to the wholeness of our grand being, it becomes easier to accept different their perspectives, even when we don’t understand them.

Related Article: How to Stop Bad Vibes: 5 Ways to Neutralize Negativity

It is some people’s job in the grand consciousness to explore consciousness. It is some people’s job in the grand consciousness to be ignorant of the grand consciousness. It is the job of some people to uplift and be caring and kind, and it is other people’s jobs to explore the darkness.

We are of an infinite consciousness, after all, so there have to be an infinite number (and type) of perspectives if we are to maintain our infinite quality.

In other words, it’s ok for you to be a heart, and it’s ok for me to be a hand.  We both need each other, and we are both of the same.  After all, what would happen if the hand convinced the heart to be just like itself? Obviously, this would create a great deal of disharmony, and ultimately, it would not benefit the hand in the slightest!

If we want to truly love ourselves, we have to come to love our grand self, and our grand self is made up of many different perspectives and pieces.

So the next time you find yourself getting mad at your neighbor, your boss or your friend, consider that he or she is indeed a part of you, but with a different set of responsibilities and a different set of roles. It is his or her job to be unique, often in ways quite opposite of yours or mine.

To experience harmony in our own lives, we have to allow each piece of ourself to be what it is here to be. To truly love the whole of what we are, it’s important to love ourselves and every person we encounter, regardless of their choices and their beliefs.

Be the best heart you can be, and trust the feet of the world know how to be feet. In the end, we are all in this together, and we rely on one another to bring balance and harmony into existence.

XO, Andrea

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