Warning! Are You Seeking Social Approval?

What do you think? Are you seeking social approval?

In today’s world, many of us are concerned about the marks on the chart.  We want people to laugh at our jokes, want to get a certain number of “likes” on our Facebook and Instagram posts and we generally just want people to demonstrate their interest in who we are and what we are doing.

However, when we are chasing social approval, we are often operating from a couple of false premises.  The false premises?

That we can’t love ourselves until other people love us.

That we must behave according to other people’s standards in order to gain the love we crave.

Seeking social approval comes from a low-vibrational state

Truth be told, the higher we climb on the vibrational scale, the less social approval actually matters to us.  From a higher, more connected state, we see that all that matters is our own approval, and our own love. When we are feeling down this isn’t often obvious, but perhaps you’ve felt this clarity before in the midst of a blissful moment.

When we are in a highly connected state, it becomes less about others approving of us, and it becomes more about us approving of others.  From a highly connected state we are able to radiate light out into the world, instead of sitting sadly in the dark, waiting for the light to reach us.

Related Article: 7 Easy Law of Attraction Strategies for Your Social Media

Try the backwards approach!

Now, if social approval is something you’ve been wanting (and if you are like most of us it probably is, at least some of the time!),  try out the following exercise:  try giving your approval to others instead of waiting for approval from them.

When we love our neighbors, when we are accepting of our children and when we are kind to strangers on the street, we radiate love out into the world.  Then? The Law of Attraction must bring approval back to us.

So look around and say thanks for the good you see people doing. Smile when you see someone being kind. Say a quick prayer for someone you love.  You don’t have to do much and you don’t have to be obvious about it, just take a little time to feel love for the people around you.

This is a really easy strategy anyone can use to improve social relations with others and to feel the love they seek.  When we love others unconditionally, we operate from that higher plane, and then all the love and approval we could possibly want spills back into our own lives. It’s really quite remarkable.

Remember, gaining social approval is often underwhelming!

It’s tempting to chase after approval, to people-please and to do what we think others want of us in order to get a pat on the back. However, these actions never have the results we are really wanting because these actions come from a place of lack.

When we are wanting social approval, what we really crave is love and connection with others, and that is something that can be easily gained when we give it out rather than turn cartwheels trying to receive it.

Love others (and more importantly, love yourself!) unconditionally. Be the love you wish to receive, and it will come back to you in spades.

XO, Andrea

(Law of Attraction coach & educator)

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6 Comments

  • Rashmie B
    Posted August 31, 2016 5:32 am 0Likes

    Hi Andrea, it often does happen with me, i would text someone(really special) and expect a reply..but most of the times i see it being read and without the response being made. So since I’ve become to understand the LOA and the way it works..i try a lot to refrain myself from saying could you respond to my texts (cause i know the more I do the more I get it!!) but i’m really finding it difficult to pull a way out of this.

    Any suggestions.

    Thank you!!

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted August 31, 2016 2:10 pm 0Likes

    Hmm Rashmie…perhaps it would help to see what it is you are REALLY looking for. If it is validation, perhaps see if you can validate yourself more. When we love and validate ourselves, it comes in abundance from others <3 <3

  • NV
    Posted August 31, 2016 3:11 pm 0Likes

    when you say validate myself, can you please expand the meaning in terms of the above question of Rashmie?

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted September 1, 2016 8:59 am 0Likes

    Of course NV! A lot of times we look for validation outside of ourselves. We aren’t fully loving or supporting ourselves, so we look outside of ourselves for the love and support. Then, it doesn’t come as much as we like, because we only receive what we are radiating from our own self.

    It can be helpful to boost feelings of self-love and self-esteem when we feel devoid of social approval. Focus on the things you like about yourself. Make choices that are in your own best interest. Treat yourself with kindness. Speak to yourself in love. This helps.

    After a steady practice like this, the need for social approval starts to disappear, and then (paradoxically as always) social approval follows. 🙂

  • NV
    Posted September 1, 2016 10:18 am 0Likes

    perfect thank you

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted September 1, 2016 3:18 pm 0Likes

    XOXO NV!

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