Make Peace With What Is  (& Make it Better!)

The Law of Attraction is all about paradoxes, and this is a big one: You’ve gotta make peace with what is before you can get something better.

Most of us learn about the LOA and we immediately want to put it to use to make our lives better. We identify all the things we DON’T have, and we go to work to try to make them happen. 

So, we focus on the boyfriend we don’t have yet, the promotion we haven’t gotten, or the weight we haven’t lost yet.  We focus on what is lacking in order to try to create what is wanted into our realities.

Unfortunately, this strategy doesn’t work! You’ve gotta make peace with what is first.

When life isn’t good enough as it is

If you focused on why your life isn’t good enough as it is, you only amplify the “my life isn’t good enough” vibe. Then, thanks to the Law of Attraction, your life will continue to feel “not good enough!” Your reality will always reflect back to you your dominant belief structure.

For example, you can’t focus on how much your hate your current home and hope you’ll be able to find one you’ll love. Sure, you may move and you may find a new home.  However, rest assured, you will be just as dissatisfied with your new home as you were with the old one. 

This is because with the LOA we are always creating whatever is a match to our dominant thought patterns.  If we believe where we live sucks, then where we live must continue to suck. It doesn’t matter where we go or how many times we move.

You’d be much more successful in making peace with your current home, and coming to love it as it is.  Once you make peace with your current home, you become a match to homes you love. The universe will knock its socks off to match whatever you’re putting out there.

So, if you want your life to be great, you have to start projecting the vibe that says “my life is great now!” This is done by making peace with what is, and loving it as it stands.

Why so many people project dissatisfaction over satisfaction

I know making peace with what is can seem a bit counterintuitive. 

Most people have been raised to believe they have to improve their lives, and that their lives aren’t good enough as they are. People are also often taught to evaluate the problems in their lives more closely than the blessings.

Unfortunately, this social programming keeps many of us stuck in a rut. This is why you know a guy who’s on his third failed marriage. This is why you have a friend who is always sick. This is why so many people go on a different diet every year.

When we focus on what’s lacking, we create more lack. On the surface things may change, but it’s just the same shit, different day.

Remind yourself of this principle of the LOA on a regular basis. When you find yourself criticizing where you are, remember you are perpetuating lack. Being happy where you stand will make you a match to people, events and situations that reinforce your happiness, not your lack.

How do you make peace with what is?

One thing you can do right now to make peace with where you are is to play the “perspective game.” The perspective game enables you to make peace with where you are in the present moment.

To play this game, step into someone else’s shoes and evaluate your life from an alternative perspective.  List out the things you have, and view them from the perspective of not having them. Imagine living a life where the things you have right now are still just dreams to you. The bigger the list, the better.

Here is a short list of things I have in my life.  To play the perspective game, I write out the list, and then take a moment imagining my life without these blessings: 

  1. I have two healthy and adorable children.
  2. I have a wonderful husband who loves me and treats me like a queen.
  3. I have a great relationship with my brother. He is a kindred spirit to me.
  4. I have close friends I get to spend lots of time with.
  5. I have a bunch of friendly and positive clients and I run my own business.
  6. I’m healthy and in good shape.
  7. I’ve had an exceptional education, and I have lots of skills and knowledge that benefit me because of it.
  8. I live near the beach.
  9. I drive my own car.
  10. I get to vacation several times every year.
  11. I own my own home.
  12. I have money in the bank and my expenses are always paid with ease.
  13. I really like all of my neighbors.
  14. I’ve got an awesome phone and computer and all kinds of cool technological gadgets.

To me, each of the items on this list seems very normal to me, because they are each a part of my current reality.  However, these things are HUGE dreams for some people out there. 

In fact, just looking at this list makes me feel like my life is pretty great.  I can’t even imagine living a life without my relationships, my health or my education. Yet, there are people out there who live without these blessings every day.

It’s very hard for me to justify dissatisfaction with my life when I look at things from this perspective.  I’m just too grateful for what I have when I look at it this way.

Why perspective matters

When I look at this list through the perspective of those who don’t have what I already have, it reminds me just how blessed I truly am. When I look at my life through this lens, it’s easy for me to make peace with where I am. 

Related Article: 20 Heartfelt Ways to Say Thank You

When I look through my life focused on what I haven’t created or achieved, it’s much, much easier to feel unfulfilled. I’m not at peace when I evaluate my life based on my unfulfilled dreams.  How at peace I am with my life has everything to do with which perspective I choose to take.

In playing this perspective game, you come to see all of the wonderful things you have already created in your life.  You are focused on what you HAVE rather than what you DON’T have.  This projects a vibe that shouts out “I am fortunate in so many ways!”

A message like this becomes reinforced in your reality, allowing more and more good things to come into your life. The universe must continue to bless you, if you believe you are blessed.

Work within the paradox!

So, if you are wanting to use the Law of Attraction to improve your quality of life, make sure you are working within the paradox.  You’ve gotta make peace with what is before something better will come along. 

Remember, your life is great right here and now, regardless of where you stand.  There are always dreams you have achieved, and there are always reasons to be grateful. When you acknowledge this truth and declare your life to be great, your life will reflect greatness back to you in spades.

How is your life already great? Why is where you stand a wonderful place to be? Feel free to comment below and declare the greatness of your life right now!

XO, Andrea

Are you a student of the Law of Attraction?

Sign up for my free Law of Attraction newsletter for conscious advice to help you attract positive outcomes into your life.  You can also become a member of my LOA member website and gain access to a library of video tutorials, ebooks, audiobooks and meditations.  Learn how to attract the things you want with fun, clarity and success!   Join today for as little as $1.99 or become an annual member for 30% in savings.


  • Kristen
    Posted July 11, 2016 10:46 pm 0Likes

    Awesome article, Andrea!! Thank you so much! It helped refocus my LOA beliefs, so that I can manifest more consistently.

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted July 12, 2016 7:31 am 0Likes

    Thanks for your kind comment Kristen! I’m so glad you enjoyed the article 🙂

  • Rashmie B
    Posted July 12, 2016 11:48 am 0Likes

    Amazing article(probably I should you call you Amazing Andrea!!). This one truly shows the other side…tells us as to what happens when the focus is on want where we are emphasising lack.

    So to count on my positives at the moment here’s the list:

    I have a wonderful family who are very loving and caring.
    I’ve a bunch of closest friends whom I can rely upon completely.
    I’m fit and fine and so is my family which is great.
    I’ve a job in hand which makes me financially independent.
    I’m educated and on my way to complete my professional degree in finance which makes me proud.
    I’ve a very lovely sister who dots on me and ensures I’m happy always.
    I’ve few very humorous friends who are just amazing and I love being around with them.
    I’m thankful to my parents for the values, knowledge they have imparted to us so that we could be better humans.
    I’m lucky to have cousins who are always high spirited who enjoy being happy and also making others happy.

    Loads more to go!!!

    I’m so happy while I’m writing this!! It really makes me feel blessed and fortunate!!

    Thank you!!

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted July 12, 2016 12:11 pm 0Likes

    Lovely Rashmie! Thank you for sharing this list. I love it! It’s amazing how good life looks when we allow ourselves to see it from this perspective. You are very blessed 🙂

  • Sabrina Hewick
    Posted July 14, 2016 10:19 am 0Likes

    Thank you Andrea, you have enlightened me once again, its like just a few minutes ago I was on my balcony and just loved the scenery after we had heavy rain and lighting during the night, it is cloudy now and not so hot and humid. I just felt so great just taking it all in. I don’t need the sun to make me feel good, I just feel good and blessed about my life, as I was enjoying my coffee I was asking the universe to help me decide If I should move out of this place,( than I see this article of yours, its like I was meant to see it right this moment)..and try and move into my dream home that I have been visualizing every time I close my eyes, I love my current apartment but due to problems with the management I am contemplating if I should or not. I than realized I will enjoy being here until I get an answer or a sign which will let me know if its the right decision. I have a lot of things to be grateful for, my three beautiful sons, a great man in my life my two cats and our health, what more can I ask for, when I surround myself with negative people I try and see the positive in them and the reason they are that way, because many of them don’t believe in the LOA but that is fine, that is their perspective, I am a great believer and continue to be blessed with so much in abundance, I do have what a lot of people lack, which is sad if only they were more positive and got out of their bitchy and constant complaining mode, they would be happier.I just try and leave a conversation as soon as something negative arrives on the topic…lol…
    Once again please keep your articles coming, I enjoy each and every topic. Thank you again for all your advise and helping people to see all the greatness in their lives instead of complaining.
    Take care..

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted July 14, 2016 10:28 am 0Likes

    Thanks Sabrina! This comment definitely brightened my day. I very much appreciate your support, and your kind words:) I like your idea of waiting for an answer or a sign on the new home. In your state of appreciation it will become very clear which direction to take. When you receive your sign, feel free to share it with me. I love success stories.

    Have a beautiful day!

    XO, Andrea

  • Clint
    Posted July 16, 2016 8:03 pm 0Likes

    Thank you Andrea I’ve been believing lately that the universe is talking to me showing me things that I want and I’ve been trying to apply them by enjoying what I have now I struggle a little bit because of my job but I’m going to refocus on that thank you for this article

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted July 17, 2016 10:46 am 0Likes

    Thanks for your kind words Clint, I’m sending some good vibes your way! Enjoy aligning with the knowledge that where you are is a wonderful place to be. <3

    XO, Andrea

  • NV
    Posted August 12, 2016 1:30 pm 0Likes

    what is your advice on someone wanting to loose weight by using LOA? so should one be making peace with how they look right now (healthy body, able to move flexibly, etc)

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted August 12, 2016 2:01 pm 0Likes

    Hi NV! A lot has to do with your thought processes, of course. Below is an article I wrote awhile back on limiting belief structure and weight loss.

    It is important that you either believe you can lose weight easily OR that you follow behaviors you believe will cause you to lose weight. This is why many people experience weight loss when they diet-they believe it will cause weight loss.

    Here are some other suggestions

    1. Focus on aspects of my body you like on a regular basis.
    2. Dress well, in order to feel better about your body.
    3. Step on the scale when you feel GOOD, because when you feel good it is more likely the scale will reveal a number you wish to see.

  • Anonymous
    Posted July 25, 2020 11:07 am 0Likes

    Thank you for your article.i have been doing LOA for 4 months and have felt great, until the other day when after going through a rigorous job interview process and being 1 of 2 candidates, the company chose the other. I was certain that the job was mine based on clues and impressions and feedback from the hiring manager. I saw myself there; I was ready for this role, but the wind got knocked out of my sales and I am struggling emotionally. I don’t understand why the universe took me that far only to slam the door shut. I have been out of full-time work in my chosen profession, which resonates with me and maps to my skills/education for over 1 year and am scared. I am getting older and these opportunities seem scarce. I don’t understand why LOA and the universe let me down.

  • Cynthia
    Posted July 25, 2020 11:37 am 0Likes

    Hello and thank you for the article. Since the comments are from 2016 I am not sure if the comment section is still active but wanted to reply. I have been doing LOA for four months and have felt great, until this week and am struggling emotionally and having less faith in the LOA process. I just underwent a rigorous job interview process for a role that fits my education and work experience. It was made for me. It resonated with me…it just felt right. I have been out of FT work for over one year. I

  • Cynthia
    Posted July 25, 2020 11:40 am 0Likes

    The comment I left got cut off. Basically I am struggling to understand why I didn’t get this job, and why the LOA process and universe took me all the way through the interview process, only to slam the door shut. I really thought I had it based on feedback, my intuition and impressions from the hiring manager.

  • Abhishek Kumar
    Posted June 16, 2021 1:09 pm 0Likes

    This article is nice buy i have a query…..if suppose i want to loose weight and i have asked for 55 khs of weight and now i am 60kgs… if i would be happy with 60kgs then m I not sending request to the universe that i love this weight give it to me because asking for change is also same….we think about the thing that we want with pleasure so if we be happy with our current situation are we not giving it energy to attract it in future

Leave a comment