How to Make Friends With the Law of Attraction
Friendship is something that most people desire. Many of us want to feel connected to other people, and we wish for a sense of belonging. The good news is that anyone can use the Law of Attraction to bring more friendships into his or her life. Here’s how to make friends through the process of attraction.
1. Put yourself out there:
Get out of the house/office/cubicle once in a while and mingle around actual people (not just social media accounts). If you are in the habit of isolating yourself, you will attract more isolation. To attract people, you must be in the habit of being around people.
As an introvert myself, I realize that this is often easier said than done for some of us, so if it is for you, please take baby steps. You don’t have to go to an all-night rager, but you can step out into public for a few minutes to run out to a coffee shop, at the very least. Make it your intention to spend a little more time around people every day and you will attract more people into your life.
2. Accept invitations:
The older I get, the more that I see that this is one area that prevents a lot of people from gaining and maintaining friendships. Though it might seem more comfortable to stay in at night or on the weekend and keep our usual routine, when we get in the habit of always saying “no” to social invitations, they start to fade away.
This doesn’t mean that you have to accept every offer that comes your way, but if there is someone who you like and appreciate in your life and you want to build a relationship with them, make an effort to meet them halfway if and when they extend themselves to you.
When we are young, this feature of friendship seems to come naturally. Kids just can’t wait to go to the sleepover or play outside with their friends. But with age, we tend to become a bit more reclusive, and this inhibits our abilities to build true friendships with others.
Be willing to say “yes” once in a while to attract more friends into your life.
3. Rise above judgement:
Another thing that prevents good friendships with others is judgement. When we get in the habit of judging others in a negative light we push good people away, because most people who are capable of true friendship are not a vibrational match to constant criticism. For this reason, judgement can be a powerful friend-repellent.
To be certain, we may win some followers or minions with judgement, but we will not win caring and loving friendships. To have true, compassionate friendships we must first project love out into the world and look for the good in others. So make it your intention to find qualities that you like about the people around you, and more people with redeeming and accepting qualities will be drawn to you with the Law of Attraction.
4. Be a friend to others:
This is probably the most important item on the list. If you want to attract friends, you must first be a friend. Extend a kind favor, send an invitation, pick up the phone or send a quick text to the people you care about. We get what we are, not necessarily what we want. So if we want to attract friends, we must first be the friends we wish to have.
Especially as we grow older, friendships can become a bit more elusive. Sometimes we may have to relearn how to make friends. Fortunately, we can use the Law of Attraction at any age to attract friendship.
Remember, we attract the essence of what we are, so get out around people, say “yes” to invitations, radiate love instead of judgement and, above all, be a friend first. These four actions can make anyone a friend-magnet.
XO, Andrea
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Image by Juliana Coutinho. This image has been cropped and resized.
10 Comments
Michaela
Hi Andrea,
I’ve just discovered your website some days ago and really enjoy reading your articles.
One question about Law of Attraction and attracting the right people/friends:
I wonder why I must be “in the habit of being around people” and accepting invitations even if I’d be more comfortable staying at home – isn’t this contrary to what you write in some of your other postings? That it’s best to take the “path of least resistance” and choose inspired action instead of forcing myself to do things I really don’t want to do?
Most of the time when I read articles about how to attract friends with the LOA, I feel somewhat uncomfortable because it seems to be expected that I have to take actions that don’t feel good to me and even go against my nature.
Why does the Law of Attraction seem to work with so (supposedly) little effort in so many other areas but not for attracting the right companions? Why can’t they just “come to me” via my vibration?
I hope you understand what I mean.
I’d love to hear your take on this –
Thank you!
Michaela (Germany)
Andrea Schulman
Hi Michaela!
You’ve asked some great questions…and I hope I can do them justice 🙂 It sounds like you have a pretty good grasp of the Law of Attraction, just that we’ve bumped up against one of your more challenging areas. We all have an area or two that make us question our abilities from time to time!
As I mentioned in the article, I too am a bit introverted and I enjoy spending time at home and sometimes it seems more comfortable to say “no” to invitations and group events. Unfortunately, if we only follow our instincts to stay alone-we are more likely to remain alone. In this case the desire to have friends is offset by the desire to be alone. Friendship is, after all, about spending time with people rather than being alone.
So to answer your question about the companions, the reason they are hard to manifest is likely because your “alone” vibe is dominant. To attract a few friends we simply have to adjust it to being a little bit more sociable. The good news is that as you are introverted, chances are you would be perfectly happy with just a few close friends rather than a herd of acquaintances. Opening yourself up to a couple of friends will take FAR less socializing and invitation-accepting than will becoming the town busy body 🙂
This means you shouldn’t have to dive off of the “path of least resistance.” Instead of attending wild parties, you could simply accept a one-on-one lunch invitation. Instead of throwing a big party at your house, invite someone you like to go see a movie you’ve been wanting to watch. Instead of hanging out in a large crowd, you could go to the local bookstore and read a magazine all by yourself. Just try to get out there enough to invite a bit more sociability into your life.
Small, small steps is the way to go for an introvert looking to expand her social circle. So by all means, please stay on the path of least resistance, just make sure you are taking the path that heads to “friends” rather the one that leads to “alone!”
I hope this is helpful!
Michaela
Andrea, thanks so much for your reply 🙂 – it is indeed very helpful and the whole topic of manifesting friendship makes much more sense to me now!
I tried the active approach of meeting new people some months ago, I almost forced myself to go out more and participate in courses, workshops, etc. It’s not that it wasn’t interesting but I didn’t even make a single new contact that way. It did seem forced to me, as if I wanted to make it happen with far too much effort. Does that make sense?
Now I find myself somewhat exhausted. I don’t feel like going out and participating at all – not because of being too shy or too negative but just because I have no idea and no clue where to go, what to do. Nothing piques my interest (which is pretty unusual for me), there’s nothing I would really like to do, no inspired action that I could take, …
Do you have a suggestion what I could do in my particular situation? I would so love to make the LOA work for me! (So far, it never did …)
Thank you – I really enjoy your website!
Andrea Schulman
Hi again Michaela!
Yes, it does seem that you were “trying too hard” before. The rule of thumb is, if it’s uncomfortable-it’s too much. If I were you, I would honor how you feel right now and maybe take a break from trying for a while. Step back into your comfort zone for a little bit and perhaps try again when the shell shock wears off. There’s no rush to any of this, so there’s no need to push ahead when you feel you need a break.
Next time you feel up to the task, take much smaller steps. The forced interaction of courses and workshops might be a bit much for you, because you will have to deal with the energy of a big group, and this can be draining for those of us with introverted personalities. Smaller sessions, and perhaps one-on-one interactions might be much better in your case. Before stepping out into a social situation always ask yourself “am I comfortable with this?” before making the commitment. If it feels like it is too much, discard the idea and wait for a more comfortable one to come to you.
Again, you are probably the type of person who would be satisfied with a few close relationships, so it isn’t necessary for you to be around crowds of people day after day to attract a few good friends 🙂 Smaller, more intimate interactions is probably the way to go.
All the best,
Andrea
Michaela
Thank you again, Andrea – this is such great advice! 🙂 Thank you especially for giving me the “permission” to do what feels comfortable. This feels like a relief, I think I might need that at the moment.
Still, I miss having good friends in my life – and yes, a few good friends would be more than enough for me. I wish some opportunity would just open up or I would feel an inspired action I could follow … I feel so clueless at the moment.
What do you think about visualizing a great friendship – might that work, too?
I appreciate you taking the time to answer my questions – thank you! 🙂
Michaela
Andrea Schulman
Hi Michaela 🙂
While visualization CAN work, in your case I would not suggest it. When we want something really, really bad trying to visualize and “make” it happen just doesn’t work. This is the paradox of the Law of Attraction: when we TRY and overthink the things we want stay away from us. When we LET GO, things come to us.
From our exchange I can tell you have been trying really hard to make friends come to you with the Law of Attraction. At this point, I would make it my mission to accept that friends haven’t come and shift my attention to another subject in my life that was bringing me more joy 🙂
If you can distract yourself from the friendship issue and simply work to raise your vibration, the negative focus you are currently projecting on this subject will neutralize. In other words, right now your focus and efforts are projecting a vibe that says “Why haven’t friends come to me yet?” and so the universe continues to not bring you friends to match your focus of friends not being there.
Meditate, listen to inspiring music and pursue interests and experiences you enjoy. Have fun with the life you have now, and make fun your focus and the universe will bring you more things that will make you happy (including friends).
It may seem counterintuitive, but when you stop trying so hard it will become easier.
All the best! 🙂
Andrea
Michaela
Thanks, Andrea – this is good advice and you’re so very right: “Letting go” is just the message I seem to get from all sides. Actually it’s relevant for most areas of my life at the moment.
I *do* know that, too, but reading your reply made me aware of it again.
I like how you explained it: “… right now your focus and efforts are projecting a vibe that says “Why haven’t friends come to me yet?” and so the universe continues to not bring you friends to match your focus of friends not being there.” I’m afraid that’s true. And I know, too, that trying too hard is just the wrong way to go about this.
Thank you for reminding me and thank you for your help, it’s very much appreciated! 🙂
Michaela
Andrea Schulman
Absolutely! I think it is very common people to hold on a little too tight-I do it myself sometimes 😉 I appreciate your comments Michaela, thanks for your support -Andrea 🙂
Randy
Hi Andrea,
You are intelligent & correct in your use of law of attraction.
When going out to get around people & accepting invitation from people, you are building a belief system & energy that insures that it will consistently happen in a person’s life. Good !
Andrea Schulman
Thanks for the compliment Randy! I appreciate that. It sounds like you have had success in building good relationships 🙂 All the best, Andrea