Learning From My Reflection

Even though I know other people are my best mirrors, sometimes I still forget.

Yesterday, I was reminded yet again about how important it is for me to acknowledge the reflection I get from others.

Through the Law of Attraction, what unfolds around you is an accurate depiction of what is going on within you. For better or worse, it is always YOU.

Now, this seems wonderful when reality is roses and sunshine, but sometimes not so much when things are grey and dreary.

Fortunately, though, the negative reflections always provide us with invaluable information we can use to grow into higher states of being. Negative reflections are our greatest opportunities for personal growth.

I’m coming to learn more and more that how I react to another person is very important.

Ultimately, learning from my reflection in others requires me to be aware of how I feel when people speak to me. I must acknowledge my response to what is said to know what the reflection is showing me about myself.

When someone says something to me and it makes me feel GREAT, there is something positive in that statement that I believe about myself.

By contrast, when someone says something and it makes me feel AWFUL, there is something in that statement that illustrates a limitation I’ve been holding on to.

Related Member Video: Finding & Erasing Limiting Beliefs (17 min)

Case in point:

Yesterday, someone extended concern to me that they had hurt my feelings.

That really irritated me-and I quickly shot back with a cavalier “don’t worry about me, it’s not like I’m going to go home and cry about this.”

After all, I’ve always prided myself for being able to “get over it” quickly, much quicker than other people.

If you hurt my feelings, I brush it off. I move on. I don’t need to talk about it, I don’t need you to see my point of view-I just move on.

I may shed one tear for you if you were significant in my life, but that’s about it. Just one tear. That’s all you get.

The fact that this person thought I’d get upset really annoyed me. “Can’t you see I’m stronger than that?” I thought.

And that’s when I started to realize I was receiving a lesson from my reflection.

I know that when things really get under my skin someone has just accurately highlighted something within me that desires a transformation.

See, when someone speaks to me and says something that irritates me to my core, I know that they are pointing out something in ME I really want to let go of.

The lesson:

What was my reflection telling me I wanted to let go of? How guarded I am in my personal relationships.

I’ve never really trusted people with my pain.

I’ve made it my mission to be strong, without realizing that being vulnerable is one of the biggest indicators of strength. After all, you can’t be truly strong if you can’t let others in.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m more honest about who I am now than I have ever been in my life. I write blogs, I put my face out on video and I speak my mind to the world at large. And this has been great for my personal development.

Putting myself out there publicly has helped me start to build a foundation of greater authenticity. These vehicles have allowed me to be myself more freely than ever.

But in my personal relationships, I’ve still been holding on to the walls. I may be letting a few more people peek over the edges and see through the cracks, but the walls are still there.

This is most notably the case when I get hurt. If you hurt my feelings, I’ll be damned if I let you see it-or even acknowledge it myself.

And that’s the God’s honest truth about how I’ve been handling pain my entire life.

But when I finally decided to ask “why does this comment REALLY bother me?” It was all made clear: I hate feeling like I have to keep it all in.

But I don’t have to keep it all in-I can choose otherwise.

Other people are our best teachers.

The universe graciously put this person in my life to teach me that it’s time to start taking down the walls. This is the next stage of my development, the next climb on my eternal journey.

What a relief. Holding it all in is a burden I’ve carried on my shoulders now for 38 years.

And the funny thing is, when I got home and realized this-I cried. And not just one tear, the floodgates opened up. Can you see the symbolism in that?

So it’s time to open up more. It’s time to be more vulnerable.

It’s ok to let people see my pain. It’s ok if people see me cry. My relationships with other people will only become truly authentic when I allow myself to be vulnerable.

There is strength in vulnerability. It isn’t the weakness I’ve been playing it out to be my whole life.

So today, I write this blog as much for me as for you.

When someone gets under your skin, there’s a reason for it. It wouldn’t bother you if it wasn’t urging you to let go of something you’ve been holding onto.

And though what you’ve been holding onto may feel like a security blanket, if you feel the need to defend it-it’s holding you back.

Every person you meet is a mirror of your inner world. Use these mirrors to your advantage, and let the painful reflections teach you what you’ve been wanting to shift within yourself.

XO, Andrea (Law of Attraction Educator)

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  • Leomie
    Posted February 6, 2018 3:15 pm 0Likes

    Hi Andrea , I too don’t let people see my pain because many years ago I was very needy and have done much personal growth. I am still doing it. However, I know longer want to be seen as a person “with many problems”, so I keep any pain to myself.

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted February 7, 2018 11:05 am 0Likes

    I hear ya Leonie! Sending <3 (P.S., you just opened up there a little bit-so good work there!)

  • Fiona
    Posted February 11, 2018 3:55 pm 0Likes

    Bravo, Andrea, thank you for your authenticity and for sharing something that really resonated. So I’ll join you and promise to honour myself and be vulnerable so that I can move forward in life.

  • Mafe
    Posted February 11, 2018 6:03 pm 0Likes

    Beautiful article I feel identified with your example too. Thanks for sharing it

  • Melinda
    Posted February 11, 2018 9:11 pm 0Likes

    Thank you !!

  • Suzanne
    Posted February 11, 2018 10:04 pm 0Likes

    Thank you for sharing your heart. It’s all divine orchestration, and the synchronicity of you posting this at a perfect time for so many people I’m sure. It was exactly the insight I needed for my situation today. Thank you!

  • victor B seeley sr
    Posted February 11, 2018 11:02 pm 0Likes

    Thank You. Perfect Timing That To B There To Read Timing,

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted February 12, 2018 10:35 am 0Likes

    Fantastic Victor-good synchronicity 🙂

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted February 12, 2018 10:35 am 0Likes

    Wonderful, glad you enjoyed it Suzanne 🙂

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted February 12, 2018 10:35 am 0Likes

    Welcome Melinda 🙂

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted February 12, 2018 10:35 am 0Likes

    Thanks Mafe!

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted February 12, 2018 10:35 am 0Likes

    Thanks Fiona, much appreciated <3

  • Tom
    Posted February 14, 2018 2:29 pm 0Likes

    Good one. I’m going to think about this, esp. the little things that people do that get under my skin.

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted February 15, 2018 11:02 am 0Likes

    Thanks for sharing your feedback Tom 🙂

  • Amy Hale
    Posted February 20, 2018 2:06 pm 0Likes

    This came at the perfect time. I recently let a comment get under my skin and couldn’t let it go right away. Now I’m thankful for it. Thank you!

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted February 21, 2018 12:39 pm 0Likes

    Glad to hear it Amy-thank you!

  • ariane
    Posted April 1, 2018 3:21 pm 0Likes

    thanks for sharing this with us Andrea and well done on allowing yourself to be more vulnerable. I completely agree. Facing our problems or our pain is a sign of strength. And whatever it is that triggers us points to things that we were unable or unwilling to see or accept in ourselves , that are wanting to be transformed. wishing you all the best with putting down the walls 🙂

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted April 1, 2018 4:29 pm 0Likes

    Thanks for your kind words Ariane <3

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