It’s very common to hear others use blame to excuse their troubles or mistakes. For example, how often do you hear someone blame outside circumstances for arriving late to work, a date or an event?
It’s pretty rare to hear someone simply say “hey, I’m sorry I’m late” and leave it at that. It’s a lot more common to see a late arriver sigh with exasperation, roll their eyes and announce loudly to the people awaiting their arrival “ugh, traffic was horrible!”
We tend to use blame because we feel that by explaining our innocence in the issue, we will somehow gain sympathy from others or simply make this problem somehow less of our responsibility. Unfortunately, due to the Law of Attraction, blaming outside circumstances for our problems only makes things worse (no matter the situation). Here’s why:
1. Blame is often an assertion of a negative emotion: When you assert blame, generally there is some anger or discontent behind it.
Please remember, negative emotions only attract more negative events into your experience through the Law of Attraction. The more someone uses blame to excuse a particular problem, the more they will continue to experience this problem in their life.
We often see phenomenon this play out in our living relationships. Someone who has been in the habit of blaming their significant other or roommate for the mess in their house will likely continue to come home to a mess day after day. Even if the other person is truly messy, focusing negatively on this behavior through blame will only encourage more messy behavior form them.
2. Blame often annoys people: If, let’s say, a friend of yours spreads a sworn secret you’ve confided in them, you’re probably going to be upset about it.
If, when confronted, your friend makes an excuse for their behavior, chances are they are trying to gain a little sympathy from you so you won’t be mad. But will this ever work on you? Probably not, because no one likes to hear why it’s ok to be disrespected or treated unfairly.
When we find ourselves in situations where we have messed up, even when there is a good excuse, it’s always better to just say “I’m sorry” and take responsibility for our part without naming a scapegoat. No one likes to hear excuses.
Taking responsibility is the quickest way to resolve a tense situation with another person.
3. Blame robs you of your power: When we blame outside circumstances for our realities we give away our power.
In truth, the world around us is simply a reflection of the world inside of us. Therefore every car crash, every traffic jam and every cloudy day are in some way a reflection of what’s going on in our thoughts, beliefs and actions.
By blaming outside circumstances, we tell the universe that we don’t believe in our unlimited power to create anything and everything. As a result, we unintentionally create more chaos in our realities. This, again, is because the Law of Attraction brings us what we are thinking about. If we are projecting the thought that we are victims of bad circumstances, we will create more evidence of that belief.
So the next time you’re around someone who frequently uses blame, take stock of what’s going on in his or her reality. Chances are you will see that this person has repeated problems or mistakes, tends to alienate others and has quite a bit of chaos in his or her life. Observing how this happens in others is a great way to help remember that taking responsibility is always the preferred route.
At the end of the day, we all make mistakes and we all attract negative circumstances once in awhile. None of us is perfect. When something bad happens it’s not the end of the world and there’s no sense in beating ourselves up about it. Just remember that blaming only makes things worse. It’s much easier, in the long run, to take responsibility for our problems and then let them go.
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Image by Daniela Vladmirova. Some Rights Reserved. This image has been cropped and resized.