How to Forgive to Raise Your Vibration (4 Steps)

How to Forgive to Raise Your Vibration (4 Steps)

“Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” -Buddha

Forgiveness and inner happiness go hand in hand.  It is impossible to have peace within when you are radiating hatred out into the world.   Unfortunately, many people are never taught how to forgive.

The following four steps can help you get on the path of forgiveness so that you can raise your vibration and enjoy a happier life. 

For best results, please complete these steps in order.  Be sure to take your time with each step.  Going from “I hate you” to “I forgive you” is a rather large jump.  Instead of making the trip in one single leap, it will be easier to take a few steps and take your time with each one, moving on only when you have fully resonated with the step you are currently on.

How to Forgive: 4 Easy Steps

1. Allow yourself to feel the anger, and realize that it serves a great purpose: It is ok for you to be mad at someone and it is completely normal to get upset at people from time to time.

 In order to let go of the anger you have to first acknowledge it.  Feel it and realize that underneath the unpleasantness is a great gift: it is the universe’s way of showing you that your ego is fixated on something that is dragging your vibration down.  It is an opportunity to bring yourself into higher resonance.

2. Find your lesson in the anger: This is a tremendous lesson that I learned from Bashar and Darryl Anka.  What is this anger trying to teach you?

The only reason you get infuriated with others is because you take their words and actions personally.  If their words and actions weren’t an accurate reflection of how you felt about yourself you would just brush them off as nonsense. 

For example, if someone told me I was an ugly man I wouldn’t be upset because I am woman, so this comment wouldn’t make any sense to me.  I certainly wouldn’t be offended. 

Realize, then, that somehow this person has said or done something that you feel is an accurate reflection of yourself.  Chances are, when you identify this negative belief that you have about yourself, you will realize that your conscious self doesn’t agree with it, and it has only been an unconscious belief of your ego. 

You must identify the unconscious beliefs of the ego in order to consciously let go of them.

3. Find the other person’s lessons: When people are aligned with their higher selves and resonating at a high vibrational frequency their actions reflect love and kindness. Therefore, people only do spiteful and unkind things when they are out of alignment with their higher selves.

Try to identify why this person who has hurt you is out of alignment.  What is going on with them that is causing them distress?

Take a moment to step into the other person’s shoes and realize that underneath the facade is a person who is hurting-just like you.  This will help you find some compassion, and compassion is the cornerstone of forgiveness.

4. Look for the good:. Lastly, look for evidence that the person who hurt you has some redeeming qualities. 

Maybe he is generous.  Maybe she is a good listener.  Maybe he helped you out once when you were in a bind. 

Really take your time with this step and add as many items to it as you can.  It will help you to realize that this person is not “all bad.”

(As an added benefit, the next time you are around this person, the Law of Attraction will be more likely to bring out the finer qualities that you appreciate in them.)

Learning how to forgive is a wonderful skill to learn.  Although these steps may take you awhile to complete, if you are sincerely ready to move beyond your anger they are well worth your time.  To operate at the highest vibration possible, it is necessary that you be kind to yourself, and stop drinking the poison.

Looking for more tips on how to live a positive life?

I post daily articles on how to raise your vibration and use the Law of Attraction on my blog.  Subscribe to my member website to learn how to create your reality with my premium resources.  You can also sign up for my newsletter for more free tips like this one!

Image by Andrea Schulman.  All rights reserved.


  • Susan
    Posted April 14, 2016 3:09 am 0Likes

    Andrea, I haven’t read an article/blog in which I didn’t find something to apply to make me a better person.
    Thank you so very much.
    I look forward to having some private sessions with you in the future.

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted April 14, 2016 7:54 am 0Likes

    Hi Susan-thank you for your kind words and for sharing your thanks. It is very much appreciated! I look forward to meeting you as well 🙂

    XO, Andrea

    Posted April 14, 2016 8:50 am 0Likes

    Ever since I WAS BORN,I have never had a true love.Does this means I am a born-looser?

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted April 14, 2016 10:43 am 0Likes

    Hi Peter 🙂 Sometimes it takes a while to get into resonance with love. If you are feeling separated from love, I would suggest working on enhancing feelings of self-love and self-acceptance. We get from others what we give to ourselves through the LOA, and it is my opinion that self-love is the most important factor at play for someone who is hoping to attract love into his or her life. XO, Andrea

  • Lama
    Posted December 7, 2016 7:27 pm 0Likes

    Dear Andrea,Thank you so much for this blog,I knew what forgiveness does but I didn’t know how to forgive myself and others.Your blog has really helped me.I feel really good and happy now.I am willing to take all actions to achieve the peace of my mind.Hope to read some more positive blogs from you.Thank you so much and I am really grateful to you…

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted December 8, 2016 10:17 am 0Likes

    Aww thanks Lama, this comment touched my heart. Have a wonderful day <3

  • Nv
    Posted December 14, 2017 2:45 pm 0Likes

    Hi Andrea,
    The following happened with me three years ago when i was a people pleaser and it traumatizes me till today. I m trying to forgive this woman for her actions but it seems impossible and all i wish is for god to punish her big time which is not good.
    This person who used to be a friend yelled at me on top of her lungs infront of people in starbucks and falsefully called 911 to tell them i m beating her up while it wasnt true, wat lesson was i supposed to learn here? Thanks in advance for your insight

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted December 15, 2017 9:58 am 0Likes

    Sometimes it helps to toss the forgiveness up to the universe. In other words “right now I don’t know how to forgive this person and love them, so Universe/God/Spirit-would you do it for me?”

    This places your positive intention for forgiveness, but takes you off the hook for feeling bad about it. I hope that helps <3

  • Nv
    Posted December 15, 2017 10:21 am 0Likes

    Absolutely. You are an angel . Also your article on personal attack page 94 was bang on.

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted December 16, 2017 11:45 am 0Likes

    Thanks NV, I do appreciate that!

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