Why Some People Are MAGNETS for Bad Relationships
Have you ever known someone who always attracts the same bad relationships over and over again? Chances are, you have a friend (or two or three!) who always seems to attract cheaters, or losers, or jerks, or “unavailable” men/women.
From your observation, it probably seems like this friend is somehow a magnet for bad relationships.
Well the truth is, if your friend attracts the same kind of person over and over again, he or she actually IS a magnet, thanks to the Law of Attraction.
With the Law of Attraction, whatever we believe in and focus on becomes our reality. Our reality is an accurate reflection of our beliefs about the world and our place in it.
So, if we believe that all guys are cheaters, that will be our experience. If we focus on how much we dislike our current girlfriend, we’ll be attracted to another one just like her in the future. If we believe that we are going to be dumped, we’ll get kicked to the curb every time.
This is why it’s all too common to see someone attracting the same “bad relationships” over and over again. We may end up in different places, surrounded by different faces, but we often end up with the same kind of person over and over again.
Has this ever been your experience?
Have you been a magnet for cheaters, or losers, or jerks or heartbreakers? Have you been a magnet for people who treat you poorly or people who are “unavailable?”
Well, if you have, the good news is that you can break the cycle whenever you want, and it’s an easy process when you’re ready to do it.
All it takes is a little investigating to figure out what beliefs you are putting out there that are attracting what you do not want. After all, if you can locate the magnet, you can throw it away and stop using it.
If you’d like to know why you are attracting the same kind of person over and over again, here’s a quick exercise to help you uncover the magnet and identify the limiting beliefs you are projecting about love and relationships.
Grab a pencil and a piece of paper…
Grab a pencil and a piece of paper and at the top of it write “Why do I Attract _________ (Cheaters/Losers/Jerks/Etc)?”
Then, spend a few minutes and brainstorm every single reason you can think of that might explain why you are attracting this kind of person.
These can be statements about you, love, relationships or particular people. They can be about circumstances or events in your life. Any contributing factor that has led one of these bad girlfriends or boyfriends into your life can be considered, particularly if it’s a reason you feel strongly about or one that evokes a lot of frustration.
Flesh out the list as much as you can. Make sure to take your time with this brainstorm, because the more complete it is, the better this exercise will turn out for you.
When you’re done, look over the reasons you’ve written. These statements are the limiting beliefs you are projecting out into the universe. They are the beliefs you are carrying and focusing on that are attracting what you do not want, and they can be eliminated!
Here are a few examples of limiting beliefs I’ve encountered on love and relationships as a Law of Attraction coach.
- You can’t trust people.
- I’m not lovable.
- My parents didn’t treat me well as a child.
- I’m attracting men like my dad/women like my mother.
- Men always cheat.
- My friends always set me up with losers.
- There aren’t a lot of good men to pick from in this town.
- Women these days are lazy and expect the man to do everything.
- I’m only attracted to bad guys.
- I’ve got a hot body that attracts guys who only want one thing.
- I’m afraid of commitment so I always pick unavailable men.
- The kind of girls I want only want guys with good jobs.
- My friends/family always give me bad advice.
You get the picture…
After you’ve identified your limiting beliefs, you can start to set them aside and remove your focus and attention from them. Make it your mission to stop talking about these beliefs and to stop looking for evidence of them in your life.
Stop gossiping with your girlfriends about how much you’ve been cheated on. Stop telling your mother about how all girls just want you for your money. Stop saying these statements aloud altogether, and distract yourself from conversations, television shows, stories and songs about them as much as you can. Turn away from the problems, and you will eliminate their negative momentum.
As a replacement for all of the limiting talk, start talking about the things you like about love and relationships. Look for the things that are going well in your love life, and give them a little more PR. Redirect your focus away from what is unwanted, and place it on what is going right.
In other words, make a new list. What’s going right?
The new list…
Maybe you’re attracting bad boyfriends, but they’re often good kissers who are hot. Maybe you’re attracting the wrong girls but they’re often generous and do nice things for you. I guarantee that for every “bad” thing you are attracting, you’re attracting something else that’s good. Move your emphasis to the good.
Related Member Video: Harmonious Romantic Relationships (28 min)
Ending your dependency on limiting beliefs will help you to stop attracting bad relationships. It’s an important part of the transformational process, and it’s a necessary step if you are wanting to change the kind of relationships you are attracting into your life.
Be mindful of your words and be mindful of your focus. Through identifying and eliminating your limiting beliefs, you will have the power to change your love life for the better.
Everyone you know deserves to have love and partnership in their lives. Stay positive about love and relationships, and encourage the people you love to do the same!
XO, Andrea (Law of Attraction Educator)