5 Ways to Relax Into Your Life Force

By Deb Anderson, Guest Contributor

Have you ever had that tense, wound up, highly strung feeling and not known what to do with it? I have regularly – until recently. Those rocky, shaky, unstable feelings of impending doom are now something I “see” as a blockage to my “life force” and as an opportunity for me to shine!

The abundance of literature on “life force”; “essence”; “spirit”; “soul” “higher self” and “authentic living” is comprehensive, but there can be times when all this insight can be destructive; such as when it leads to unpleasantness for not being practiced, or for when you feel  “blocked” and unable to be you! 

This unpleasantness can vary from the pangs of guilt you get from not making a better decision for yourself in some area of your live to full-blown, diagnosed physical and mental health conditions.

So, here are my 5 tips for relaxing into and loving your own life force, wherever you are at with it. 

1. Accept that you are human!

We all have the commonality of being human – with the desire for survival being the basis of who we are.  This has allowed us to feel, think and behave naturally in ways that promote our own wellbeing. 

You are no different.  You are human and you will feel a range of emotions throughout your life. You will possibly experience the vast array of thoughts and reactions to any given situation or circumstance.  You will have your own changing needs, priorities and goals over your lifetime. 

You are a kaleidoscope of static and moving parts; of light and dark particles; of constant and changing energies – simultaneously. You are amazing! You are human and you are okay!

2. Reframe “rocky” patches!

Ideally, things in life would always go smoothly – but they don’t. And in reality, if they did then growth would be impossible. 

So prepare for setbacks and hiccups and know that the road has not ended, it has just become more interesting.  Plan for making these circumstances more enjoyable for you. 

Look for the message or lesson, for you, in the experience.  See a setback as a reminder call to adjust or practice a technique that allows your soul to sparkle.  Allow good things to happen, to you and for you, in any given situation.  You will be amazed at what you and your life force can achieve.

3. Give yourself credit!

Giving credit to yourself for a job well done is not natural for some.  Most of us are our own worst critic and way too hard on ourselves.  However, being kinder to yourself (and more importantly, giving yourself credit) is extremely important to do. 

I would recommend acknowledging (at least to yourself) whenever you have “done good” as it is so so so important to do!  Not only is it a brief pause to look inwards and actually acknowledge a growth – however small, it is also a mechanism for future change to become easier and easier and easier. 

Definitely worth the effort. Believe me!

4. Adapt to suit your own needs!

As with most things, some ideas work for some and not for others. 

You and your wellbeing are no different – just don’t get caught in the trap of thinking you’re not worth making an effort for – because you most definitely are.  We are all worthy of being holistically “well” and loving our life and its force. 

However, be prepared to do what works for you and to make changes as necessary and suitable to you.  For example, I find techniques in mediation, reiki and chakra healing relatively easy and helpful  although I struggle with exercise, expression and being an empath, so I try to adjust my techniques accordingly. 

Take journaling for example – this form of expression I struggle with, however I can “see” what I am feeling so I write my entries in the form of the third person, such as “Deb felt ………..” as if I was “ watching” what another person was doing (but it’s me) and the writing just flows.  Who knew?  Do what works for you.

5. Finally, just do it!

Practice, practice, practice!  Express your true self, impart your essence into the world and let your life force shine! Express! Create! Share! The world needs your life force and it needs you!

Share comments below.


Deb xx

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About the Author: Deb Anderson is a 44 year old woman living in Queensland, Australia with her husband.  Originally born in New Zealand, Deb is a BA graduate with a degree in Psychology and Social Justice, mother to 3 teenage sons, and step parent to 3 adult girls.  Her passions are writing and sharing. She can be found on Pinterest, under her pinner name “Fortunate Look!”

Deb favours the use of her native Maori language, when signing off – being Aroha!  In the simplest terms, Aroha means “love,” but it is also defined as-

“ breath of life…the creative force that comes from the spirit.  Aroha presumes the universe to be abundant, with more opportunities than there are people.  In social interaction it seeks the best in people, draws it out, yet is firm in not accepting aggression, greed, recycled ignorance or other behaviours that damage. Aroha in action is generous.  Aroha in group meetings seeks unity and balance.  Aroha in practice is intelligent, a unified intelligence of the heart, soul and mind.  However with the distractions of life people can lose connection.” (Source: paradise.net.nz)

Image Source: OakenHeartPhoto.com.  This image was reproduced with permission from the photographer, Brandon Marks.  All rights reserved.  Please contact Brandon to use or reproduce this image.


  • Brandon Marks
    Posted August 8, 2015 11:27 pm 0Likes

    Great article–thanks for the tips!

    There’s one thing #2 brought to mind. It’s really a strange problem to have, but a persistent one nonetheless. I’d like to think that I’ve gotten pretty good at re-framing problems to the point where I realize that they’re just passing obstacles. I think to myself or tell others around me nonchalantly “Oh, it’s fine, everything will be alright,” but at times, there’s something unsettling about that. It’s like brushing off the complexity and the severity of problems has become an automatic response, one that I use to avoid stirring up my anxiety because I never want it to “get bad” again. When that happens, I feel as though I’m not really feeling the situation deeply enough and therefore not really gaining anything out of the challenge. It’s like I’m refusing to feel fear OUT OF FEAR.

    I guess an example could be that it’s really hard for me to cry anymore, which is weird, because I’m a pretty sentimental guy and would cry not only when something was sad, but also when it was beautiful, too. I’m not sure what has changed, but I don’t get that guttural feeling anymore in situations I previously would. I may THINK that I miss old friends and family that I’ve moved away from, but my body isn’t showing it to even myself. If that sounds crazy to you, it is to me too!

    …After rereading, most of this sounds anecdotal. I guess the point of what I’m trying to ask/say is: how do you decide when to really feel what gets stirred up in those rocky patches (even if it makes them harder to get through, but possibly worth it because of what you can learn) and when to block out some of those painful emotions so that getting through doesn’t feel so impossible or unpleasant?

    …OR is it that I am supposed to feel those unpleasant emotions deeply enough, gain insight because of it, and still get through, but there’s some way of processing that I’m just not getting yet?

    Thanks in advance, this was a heavy question!

  • Andrea Schulman
    Posted August 9, 2015 9:05 am 0Likes

    I think that is a GREAT question Brandon.

    In my opinion, I think that feeling pain or difficult situations is OK. Sometimes people start to feel overwhelmed by the bad times and beat themselves up about them, and this causes more suffering. Within each rocky patch is a lesson, or something that we can gain. So through feeling our way through the pain we actually come out the other side wiser and better prepared for the next challenge ahead. I think the goal here is to accept the pain, and feel it, but seek to remember that it is taking us somewhere we want to go.

    While I think your strategy of brushing off problems is definitely a good one for smaller obstacles, I do agree with you that perhaps it’s a good idea to allow ourselves to feel those highly unpleasant emotions when they present themselves. This doesn’t mean we have to wallow in them and make them bigger than they are, but that it’s ok to have a moment here or there caught up in a lower vibration.

    In other words, we can feel the sadness, but remember that it is providing us with wisdom and preparation for the next challenge down the road. We can trust that it’s ok to have a period of suffering and that we will find our way back into the light. Then, when we’re ready, we can make some small moves to raise our vibrations and climb back up. At least, that’s how I try to handle it on this side.

    Not sure if this was the message that Deb intended to convey with her article, but this is my two cents 🙂

    All the best,


  • Anonymous
    Posted August 9, 2015 3:27 pm 0Likes

    No, it was definitely not her intent. It was just a tangent thought I had. Thanks for your response! I think that does give me some clarity.

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