When we make the choice to become more positive people, dealing with our friends and loved ones who are negatively minded can be tricky. On the one hand, we want to be supportive of them because we care. On the other hand, we don’t want our energy to get dragged down to a lower vibrational frequency.
Unfortunately, in today’s world most people have the expectation that in order to be a good person, you must commiserate when a friend or loved one is experiencing problems. You are usually expected to be a listening ear and a shoulder to cry.
Focusing on other people’s problems, however, can often be more harmful than helpful. If we allow ourselves to get wrapped up in the negativity, we only amplify the problem for the other person, and drag down our personal vibration at the same time.
So, how can we be supportive of others without getting sucked into the drama? Here are a few guidelines on how to “be there” for people in a positive way without compromising your vibrational energy:
1. Don’t preach: Negative people do not like to be told that they are being negative. Judging another person for their negativity is the quickest way to get them to shut down any of your positive suggestions.
When attempting to help a friend or relative think more positively about their situation, it’s best to be sensitive and subtle in your approach.
2. Point out the good in them: It is fairly common for negative people to suffer from poor self-esteem. Chances are, many of your negative friends and loved ones treat themselves just as badly as they treat others.
One of the best things that you can do for someone who is negative due to poor self-esteem is periodically point out the things you appreciate about them.
Tell them how much you loved the thoughtful gift they gave you, or how you’re grateful that you can depend on them for help when you need it. Compliment them on their new hairstyle. Give them a hug when they do something nice.
Pointing out and appreciating the good in people will give them a quick lift and also give them a reason to feel a little better about themselves going forward. It’s a great way to “be there” for someone in a positive, uplifting way.
3. Direct the conversation: If you have a friend or loved one who loves to gossip or complain, take it upon yourself to start up friendly conversations. Bring up something good that has happened, or something funny that you heard recently. Do your part to keep the conversation light and uplifting whenever you can.
4. Find a silver lining: If you’re like most of us, you probably have a few people in your life who like to share their problems with you. So, when they do, put a positive spin on the issues! As long as you are empathetic and nonjudgmental in your approach, you will have good results.
For example, if a coworker approaches you to complain about another person in the office, you could listen (without judgement) and then say something like this:
“Yeah, I hear what you’re saying. I’m sure lots of people would be upset with that. But maybe she didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. She’s been so helpful and nice in the past, so it’s possible that she actually thought she was helping you out.”
Play devil’s advocate, but in a gentle and understanding way. People will be more likely to change their tunes if you can (respectfully) identify a silver lining.
5. Be your best self: The more positive you can be, the less negativity you will attract. This means that if you are resonating at a high vibration, the people in your life will start to stay away from you when they are feeling negative and they will seek you out when they are feeling positive.
It’s always good to remember that when we are attracting a lot of negativity, we have to look inside of ourselves to adjust our frequencies as well! Make your vibration priority number one, and drama will start to filter itself out of your life automatically.
When all’s said and done, just because we want to become more positive people doesn’t mean that we want to cut out all of the people in our lives who aren’t making the same choice. Fortunately, we don’t have to. By consciously modifying our social interactions, we can help bring out the best in others (and ourselves!) and keep moving onward and upward.
Through resolving to stay empathetic and loving while at the same time pointing out the positives, we can help gently guide our friends and loved ones away from negativity and drama. “Be there” by for others by being positive. It’s the only way you can really support someone you care about.
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Photo Credit by Nicky Fernandes. Some Rights Reserved. This image has been cropped and resized.