Good News: You DON’T Have to Remove People From Your Life
Are you worried that if you don’t remove people from your life they will plague you with their negativity?
One of the common things I hear from people in the Law of Attraction community is that they are very concerned about surrounding themselves only with positive and uplifting people. They worry that they have to remove people from their lives, especially so-called “toxic people.”
While being around positive and uplifting people makes it easier to maintain a high vibration, it can be hard to eliminate long-time friends and family members. We also often have other people like coworkers and neighbors who are hard to avoid.
Related Article: Feeling Provoked? This Is Your Best Defense
The good news is that you absolutely do not have to get rid of anyone in your life, and you still can create a circle of positive and uplifting people.
Keeping Everyone & Still Keeping it Positive
How? Well, the behaviors and actions we witness in others are direct a reflection of our expectations. For example, if I expect my mother-in-law is going to insult me, she probably will. If I expect my coworker to steal my lunch out of the company fridge, he probably will too.
However, if I expect my mother-in-law to babysit my kids for me, she probably will. If I expect my coworker to help me with a project at work, he probably will too.
The thing is, we can attract “good” or “bad” behaviors from literally anyone! The trick is in learning to manage our expectations about people.
Energy flows where attention goes
Remember to focus as much as you can on the good, and ignore the bad as frequently as possible. In time this two-sided approach will help transform the toxic people, making them more positively-minded and easy to deal with (at least when they are around you)!
Now, I know it can be challenging to think positively about people who have treated you negatively for a long time, so be patient with this process. Over time, your ability to focus on the positive will get easier and easier as the Law of Attraction gains momentum. Ultimately, you don’t have to remove people from your life to be surrounded by positive people.
Happy Manifesting!
XO, Andrea
(Law of Attraction coach & educator)
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12 Comments
NV
so, if there is a negative person in my life, i do not remove him from my life but expect positive behaviour from him and he will behave positively?
When you say expect positive, how do we do it?
Merilynn
Thank you, Andrea!
I feel that we who are new to our Lightwork sometimes get things a bit confused while we’re trying to figure this newness out. Looking at the issues of people who are already in our lives from a different angle, and knowing that we can keep our vibration high and possibly raise theirs in the process by using the LOA is grand to know! Thank you again!!
Andrea Schulman
Hi NV! I would say that it would help to become more cognizant of what you already appreciate about the person in question. Do they have any redeeming personality traits? Do they ever do anything nice? Do they dress well? Do they have a nice voice? Focus on anything you can that you find pleasing 🙂
Andrea Schulman
Glad you liked the article Merilynn! Best wishes to you <3
Colleen
Thank you for this timely reminder as I was about to ditch my negative spouse! Haha but seriously I believe I’m getting better at leaving the negative situations in the past but I feel like so much of his “stuff” is coming up lately. I just see it coming up over and over again but he doesn’t know (or care to hear from me) that he needs to work on it to find peace. I really have lots of opportunities to practice on focusing on the positive and ignoring the negative!
Rashmie B
Hi Andrea, i’m at a place where i believe that LOA can very much influence the reactions of people…thanks for the article!! (everything makes sense)
Hope you had a nice holiday!
Kristina Nilsson
Thank you Andrea for this nice article! 🙂 I usually expect good behavior from other people (to be treated with respect and kindness in the same way i try to be to others) but found that even though i believe and expect people to be “real” i so often times end up disapointed and hurt…How can that be? does this mean that i,myself,isnt real in my beliefs and expectations? (in the subconsious mind) Can a negative programming from childhood, go so deep that positive affirmations,expectations and behaviors cant change it? (i do have a lot of childhood garbage) This “failure”to reach out with good,higher vibrations makes me so insecure about myself and makes me doubt my ability to be the best person i want to be… Also,ive noticed that “negative” thoughts and actions (even if the intentions were good) is hitting back to me quickly,while “positive” thoughts and actions doesnt… What am i doing wrong Andrea? Now,i dont do try to be “good” to be “rewarded” in any way though i think kindness is a normal way to be, but for sure i dont want to be “punished” for it.. I like to understand why the negative seems to have a stronger effect on me then the positive..and why it hits back so much faster… This is a bit of a dilemma…when you want to see the good in people but in the same time must protect yourself from people… Again thank you for this interesting article,and all your other postings! I really enjoy reading them and i think you are awesome! All the best wishes for you Andrea <3
Andrea Schulman
Haha! I hear you on the spouse Colleen! LOL! If it makes a difference I must say that over the years I have witnessed not only a transformation in myself but also in my husband. <3 <3 <3
Andrea Schulman
Thanks Rashmie! It was GREAT! <3
Andrea Schulman
Hi Kristina!
Excellent questions. I would probably say that it might make more sense in your situation to worry a little less about the other people for now (regardless of how they are acting) and spend some good time focusing as much as possible on promoting self-love and acceptance to yourself first and foremost.
I understand your statement “I do have a lot of childhood garbage.” Been there! LOL!
As long as we still identify with the garbage of the past, however, we are still in the process of tormenting ourselves and reliving it over and over again. Then, the people around us often act in ways that mirror the torment we choose to identify with. Boost up self love and try to release the past. You CAN have a good life, and you CAN view your past a catalyst for your spiritual expansion.
I choose to look at my past as the entire reason for why I live positively now. In that way, it was a true blessing and every bit of pain was infinitely worth it. This shift in perspective doesn’t make what anyone did OK, but it did allow me to release the pain and choose to live a happy life because I believe I deserve it. You deserve it too <3
XO, Andrea
Anonymous
Thanks for your help!
Andrea Schulman
You’re welcome Anonymous <3